Alexander Graham Bell,

spent simply years to inflict hell.

On the peace and quiet of this world,

with bits of wire and tuneless bells.

 

T’was he who devised the telephone,

so family can call to have a moan.

Grandpa Tom or Auntie Jane,

just dial a number to unleash pain.

 

In the office or at home,

sits the ubiquitous telephone.

But we would escape its deadly grip,

on a train or motor trip.

 

That is until some incarnation of old Nick,

went and pulled a nasty trick.

A crime against humanity so ignoble

by devising the dreaded mobile.

 

Instead of peace to read the news,

or simply have a cheeky snooze.

There came the noise of squeals and pouts,

from 20’s somethings or 30s louts.

 

“I’m on the train, you’ll have to shout.”

“Here comes a tunnel, ok I’m out.”

“I missed the bus, and will be late.”

“Oy, keep it down. I’m talking mate.”

 

But we oldies hatched a plot.

It’s what we do an awful lot.

To once again have our yin and yang,

we would implement a cunning plan.

 

In place of ‘did you know? and did you hear?’,

ending in hi-pitched byees only bats can hear.

There’s just a quiet swipe or tap,

to interrupt our journey’s nap

 

You may think kids invented apps,

but in truth, that is just crap.

It was really us you know,

oldies, codgers, goats or crones.

 

Now the 8.15 is quiet and still.

Blood pressure’s down, no need for pills.

Once more the Victorian adage reigns absurd;

the young are seen but rarely heard.